Pick Your Rock and Metal

Monday, September 12, 2005

Curriculum shock!

Iron Maiden to be added to National Curriculum shock!

News has leaked from the Council for Curriculum, Examinations and Assessment that an Iron Maiden GCSE is shortly to be added to the Northern Ireland school curriculum. A source at the CCEA revealed:

"Well, through Iron Maiden the kids can learn about:
  • The pogrom of Native Americans in the 19th Century (Run to the Hills);
  • Greek Mythology (Flight of Icarus);
  • the History of the Crimean War and Lord Tennyson's War Poetry (The Trooper; with de-caff Trooper for those in Nationalist schools who might not want the Union Jack thing);
  • the Second World War (Aces High);
  • Great English Poets - Samuel Taylor Coleridge (Rime of the Ancient Mariner);
  • Persian and Greek wars (Alexander The Great)
  • Contemporary English Fiction (The Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner);
  • English Arthouse/Cult cinema (The Wicker Man);
  • The impact of Viking culture (Invaders);
  • Plus many other topics including a psychological approach to phobias through music (Fear of the Dark).

"Hell," went on our source, "It's more than the wee scrotes learn at A-Level"

A spokesman for Maiden said: "Well, Sharon Osbourne is a wanker" but we at Belfast Metal Reunited decided not to publish that....oops, we just did!


Anonymous said...

Well J after reading this post i take it you were bored or had too much time on your hands :o)last night.I want to ask you something why do you never post anything about the tribute bands that play the Empire, The Bon Jovi Experience, what a band!!! And Limehouse Lizzy this Sat night? Lets face it these might only be tribute bands but they are 100 times better than some of the bands(rubbish) you have on here???? :o)


Jonny said...

Bah humbug, the bands I publish are neither boring or rubbish...but as we are a site dedicated to what our readers want (hello Mr Dickinson!) details of said tribute bands will be online soon!

Anonymous said...

Now thats what i wanted to hear!!,Jonny!, Biffy Clyro,Turbonegro cum on get a grip!!(not rubbish) maybe that was a bit mild but i'll say no more. I didnt mention anything about them being boring but thanks for reminding me, they are!


Jonny said...

I'll ask you kindly not to Biffy my Clyro and don't Turbo my Negro, for God's sake a man has to have some pleasures - and surely Turbonegro are the only band on the planet to come on stage in Dublin and joke about the Potato Famine! For that they at least deserve credit.

Anonymous said...

Maybe so,but surely you can think of other ways to have 'pleasure'! :o)